The Irony of Life

Jargon
Sometimes I still cant believe I threw away 6.5years datawarehousing experience, I'm living a totally new life. Finally realized a 9:30-6:30 job is possible (though I dont know for how long :p). 'Investment banking', the 'in' thing as they say. Dont know how true it is, they say in London, when a guy says he works in a bank, girls give him a second glance. When a guy says he works in an investment bank, girls flock to him without second thought. (Though in Manila, bank folks arent much of a fuzz in terms of pay and demand, I think)

Still, I dont understand what I'm doing. There is more jargon than english, and I dont know how long will I survive. Sample:

For FX futures traded directly on the CME, the CME has only the concept of a price maker, not a price taker, and the exchange operates on a FIFO (first in first out) basis. In this way it is possible only to enter a bid or offer into the CME, not to hit a bid or offer. When a bid matches an offer, the bid and offer will be filled at the rate of the first order (bid or offer) that was entered into the market. Entering bids and offers into the aggregator on the CME will function as for the other venues. However, if an aggregator user performs a price hit operation (including across multiple venus), a bid (in the case of a buy) or offer (in the case of a sell) should be entered into the CME at the chosen rate, but pulled as soon as the no more CME prices meet the entered bid or offer or until the desired amount is filled (as per existing logic).

Still, kaya ko tong panindigan, till the next layoff season.


The Fruit
My office now is situated beside a mall so sometimes I go to grocery to buy fruits as my dessert. I have 2 criteria though: something that lasts long to keep in my cabinet (since I buy the unpeeled ones), and something that's not messy to eat in the office. Of all the fruits, there's only one that fits perfectly. Mandarin orange. It lasts long and I dont need a knife to peel it and it's sweet. Suddenly everyone in the team thinks of me as the lady who is fond of oranges. I get greeted like 'hey you have an orange again'. 'You like oranges so much'.

I just smiled back. Can I just say it's not that I dislike oranges but it's actually not my favorite fruit. My favorite fruit is somewhere out there. But it's not possible to get hold of one.

In life:
there are choices that you really make.
there are choices that just happen to be there.
---- I hope i get less and less of the latter.



My House
Ok almost everyone knows I like my current house, to stay in 3 d*mn long years . I dont want to expound why coz I finally realize, 'to each, his own'. Everyone is entitled to their own preference and perception. I like it to the point that i tried my best to keep it under my wings, till one day I finally grew tired of finding replacement folks to fill in for those who go away. I'll miss this place I know, and even if other people say 'it sucks', I know I like it...

Murmurs:
...I did something stupid recently, I felt like running away, because parang d ko kayang panindigan... This same thing that I dislike being done to me, is what I think I might be doing to others. Chain of bits and pieces. Charge to experience.

Tiring. 好像聽懂我説話的人,掉了,少了.

I need a break, a breather. Even if it's expensive, I dont care.

You never know who you really are, vulnerabilities.